Monday, October 05, 2009

Marry YourSelf First: What’s Your P.L.A.N.?

Ken Donaldson
Very interesting and synchronistic things happen when I prepare for a presentation.

Sometimes, without even trying or expecting, I discover something very cool.

Creative energy at its finest moment.

Poof! And a new idea, concept, thought, tool, resource comes out of nowhere.

Or maybe it was always there just waiting to come to the surface.

Regardless of how it happens, it’s quite cool and I highly recommend it…meaning, I highly recommend you get into your creative energy and manifest some new, cool “stuff”!

Here’s what I discovered as I was preparing last week for the Marry YourSelf First!® Fun-Shop: P.L.A.N.

Yes, it’s an acronym…another acronym.

I like acronyms because they make it easier for me to remember things…and probably work the same way for you too…hopefully.

P.L.A.N.:
Prepare
Launch
Acknowledge and Affirm
NOW!

That’s it! And allow me to elaborate a bit…

First, it’s always good to have a plan. As the old cliché goes:
People don’t plan to fail, they just fail to plan.

And I have been very BAD about planning at times in my life.

In fact, I hired a new business coach a couple months ago because my lack of planning was creating a lack of productivity.

Yes…I was spinning out of control!

Enter Robin Lavitch – http://www.planitlifecoaching.com/ – my new life and business coach, and with her help I immediately I saw the issue – the absence of plans and systems - and immediately she began to help me remedy things.

Results: More focus, more structure, less stress, more happiness and...MUCH better bottomline!

But let’s get back to PLAN…

First the P

Prepare: Preparation starts with knowing where you’re going. In other words, it means having a target to aim for or at.

This is called having a Vision.

So: Do you have a Vision created for your life? Do YOU know where you’re going?

Or as Lewis Carroll (Alice in Wonderland) said, “If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there…”

Yikes, any road will get you to nowhere!

Prepare…create your Vision.

Know exactly what your Vision is (use a Vision Map) and constantly be reminded of that.

Surround yourself with visual reminders of where you’re going!

Impress and embed it into and onto your subconscious mind.

See it every day.

Next…

The L

Launch: Get into Action…Right Action.

Let me explain…

In the course of a day, there are many, many people, events, circumstances and unplanned entities which will try to take your time, energy and focus.

You can “be in action” addressing many, many tasks, but are they the “right” tasks?

Are your actions in alignment with your Vision?

If so, then great…alignment means you have integrity with yourself.

However, if your actions are NOT in alignment with your Vision, then guess what?

You’re not only out of integrity with yourself, you’re likely WAY off the path of where you’ve been intending to go.

SO…it’s imperative that your Actions be Right Actions, meaning that they are in alignment with your Vision… or else you’ll never get there!

Here’s where simple good old-fashioned planning comes in.

Write your necessary actions. I recommend (actually, Robin recommended this and I’m now doing it… so basically I’ve paid Robin to pass this info on to you… yes, you’re getting FREE coaching!) you write out your goals for the next 2-5 years.

Then break those goals down to what you need to accomplish this next month.

Then break those down to what you’ll focus on this week.

Next, write these goals into your daily schedule… and this is where many people (including me!!) get tripped up… they don’t get into their everyday scheduling and therefore, these other “urgencies” take over and steal productive time!

Yes: Launch into Right Action. Next…

The A

Acknowledge and Affirm: a.k.a. Celebrate your accomplishments!

We respond very well to positive strokes, or what we in the world of “psychobabble” like to call Positive Reinforcement.

It’s been proven hundreds of times in research that you are much more likely to repeat a behavior or set of behaviors when you create a positive reinforcement afterwards.

SO…it’s time to have a little (or big!!) party when you accomplish your tasks and goals.

Yes, reinforce your efforts and you’re more likely to repeat your efforts.

That’s one way you re-train your brain.

And lastly…

The N

NOW!

Yes, you MUST start now.

Too much has already been said about procrastination.

The sad reality is that we now live in a “Procrastination Nation.”

You CANNOT look around and base your choices and decisions on what the masses are doing because the masses aren’t doing much.

Actually, they are doing a lot…of complaining, blaming, gossiping, running around scared, etc….and not too much in the productive realm!

I know that sounds harsh, critical and judgmental, and I’ll own every ounce of it, and it’s true… in my humble (and accurate!) opinion.

Surround yourself with winners… people who are marching to the beat of their own drum.

People who’ll support your BIG goals and plans. People who will love you through all the mistakes and “failures” and kick you in the butt should you start to slip in procrastination gear.

Yes, start today doing something in alignment with your PLAN.

Otherwise, you’re failing without a plan.

That’s for sure…and you deserve to be winning with your PLAN!

After all, you ARE a Winner!

Win with a P.L.A.N.!

Peace and Prosperity…

Ken




PS Robin Lavitch gets a five star rating from me. If you want to take your business to the next level,I highly recommend Robin- http://www.planitlifecoaching.com/

Tell her Ken sent you!

PSS Go to http://kendonaldson.com/store/ and order Marry YourSelf First! It’ll help with your PLAN.

Plus invest in 5 or 10 copies now for the holidays for all those people who complain and who are living without a PLAN...they’ll be forever grateful and so will you!

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Marry YourSelf First: John Gottman on Why Marriages Succeed or Fail

Ken DOnaldson
THE KEY TO REVIVING OR “DIVORCE-PROOFING” A RELATIONSHIP...

is not how you handle disagreements (negotiating differences & improving communication).

It is in how you are with each other when you’re not fighting.

FRIENDSHIP IS AT THE HEART OF ANY LIFE-PARTNERSHIP!

The Foundation of Gottman’s Approach =
Strengthening the friendship also provides guidance in coping with conflict

Source: John Gottman’s Why Marriages Succeed or Fail